It drives me nutty but Im also contributing to the issue. I can relate to this. everyone think it is and I try to stop but its every minuet I sniff. Being shady such as embellishing on something that a co-worker did wrong Kissing up to the manager and then breaking rules behind their back or not doing their job. Yes, I think this is a big difference too. Go stand in the snow for a bit and it will seem so nice and toasty in here when you come back!. Ive heard the term thrown out as an insult, similar to using the terms granola or crunchy. Or she may simply be nuts. I find it appalling. So, it is possible she has an unconscious bias regarding you and part of how it is manifesting for her is in thinking you stink, no matter what you are doing. Hmm, I had no idea. Yeah, I was wondering if OP burns incense or something like an essential oil diffuser at home and it sticks to the clothing even after theyre washed. Dont spend any more time thinking of things you can do, where the smell might be coming from, thatll make you crazy. My cat peed on a mattress after a surgery and I could not get the smell out of my nose. I like the idea of having her walk into the office blindfolded and walk by OP and around the entire workforce, as I read earlier in this thread. Dont wear it to work is really reasonable, but asking someone to never use it is not like you said, there are other scents that are also hated by some. However, genuine allergic reactions arent necessarily going to manifest in front of their sourceits not all doubling over in the moment. My mom had the same experience with TCBY yogurt. STOP WEARING THE ESSENTIAL OILS. So Im pretty inclined to read the comments as coworker being a jerk instead of actually having difficulty working with a smelly coworker. After we stopped that we smelled. I get mild to moderate headaches.. it sucks but theyre survivable. Here are eleven behaviors you absolutely do not need to deal with in a coworker: 1. Yes: If you are delibrately "sniffing" also known as huffing, you can cause damage to your brain, heart, liver, kidneys. But it is of course very possible that this is just a drama queen who likes to make a fuss and I agree the OP should be more aggressive about it and not let the boss take the easy way out of only responding to the squeaky wheel. But unless were also banning Axe body spray or Febreze from the public sphere (if only), people get to wear whatever scent they like in public even if it annoys some other people. I understand that some people are extra-sensitive to smell and truly need to be accommodated, but its possible to be extra-sensitive and yet not act like the Perfume Police to ones coworkers, particularly a coworker who has already gone to significant lengths to mitigate any ill effects. When I mentioned it to the host, she looked baffled and said she couldnt smell anything. Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. I have this problem too. Oh man every time I see someone on here who has sniffling as a trigger I feel a little guilty. I dont like using them, because they seem very anti-social, but I will in places I cant get out of and have no chance of controlling like an airplane or in a taxi. Granted you should tone it down at work, but I and everyone else is allowed to smell like the body wash or shampoo or hand lotion of their choosing. It is going down the whole ethnic food route of complaining about stinky food. Problem is, no one around you sees the flames or senses the heat, so they have no sense of urgency to bolt for the doors. If the interruptions continue, speak to the person in private. I think at this point and said above in more detail that its now time to do a the Voice type test to find out if the smell is part of the office, or settled in the mind of the coworker to the point that they smell it if its not there. If co-worker said that the scented oils give her migraines or make her feel like shes going to vomit, I think thats a different level than just saying I dont like that scent. Its a supervisors job to do that. Jerk. The common cold is a viral infection that most people recover from in a week to 10. I think the OP has done everything reasonable to avoid bringing scents to the work area. Agreed. All the more reason to use AAMs scripts to squash the problem. Ive done X, Y, and Z. One, about patchouli just dont. You can have the honey-glazed salmon on a cedar plank. OP tell your coworker that youve done all you will do and to knock it off. Peachie, you gave it away a little when you said your mother eats with her mouth open. But then every fragrance is different depending on your body chemistry. Maybe the hierarchy of OP compared to the coworker is part of this. Unscented my butt. For the people who dislike it or for whom it is an unexpected smell, it is hated. I got to Let her sniff your jacket or your bag for example. . I empathize with those who have trouble controlling their sniffles because sometimes even the best, most consistent health care cant turn off the faucets in your face, and no amount of tissues in the world will ever be enoughbut f*ck is that repeated sound awful. Industrial carpet glue and some wood furniture finishes does it for me. Those are lengths to which I am totally unwilling to go to accommodate someone at work and I feel are things that no one has the right to ask of a coworker. If the goal was to get me to move to another desk that would be a great way to accomplish it! Hmmmm food for thought. I agree with the other posters who mention getting a second opinion and Alisons advice to bring in your manager to mediate. He doesnt wear cologne, and keeps up his hygiene (and doesnt use mothballs). Agreed. There might be something in the building that nobody is aware of. We rinsed them off and re-used them until they were super gross. I dont wear the one perfume I own (which is very light and solid perfume so I can wear a very small amount) to work because I dont want to disturb coworkers. ;). I would imagine it must smell much different to those that like patchouli because I would never call the scent I smell pleasant. My boss, his boss and my other coworkers agreed that neither of us smelled but the complaints continued. Are you using patchouli scented anything at home? She is being a jerk. I once used a mix of hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and my favorite detergent to remove cat pee from a mattress. I choked on my lunch at little cloud of toxic masculinity. My husband bought some Axe bodywash once because hes oblivious and I had to tell him to replace it because that stuff was rank. Unfortunately, its not always easy to guess whether the problem might be due to an allergy or a structural issue, Dr. Reisman says. Suggest management isolate her if living in the world is too much for her once accommodations have already been made and she wont. I think its one of those scents that everyones nose interprets differently. I suspect thats why he found me attractive :-). The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. Everything could be hated by someone, and yeah, so long as Axe is still allowed, Yep, Im not going to stop using incense and oils at home out of the worry that it might travel with me to work on my clothes, or spend inordinate amounts of time washing my clothes to make sure theyre pristine so I dont smell like patchouli. It would suck for OP if it is her entire wardrobe and she just cant smell it. I dont know if its the food they eat (not curry or garlic) or what, but they smell like Home Country when they visit America. 2. But Id be pretty cranky if someone at work told me I had to stop using some hygiene product unless it was REALLY egregiously strong-smelling (looking at you, beloved Soap and Glory lotion that I wont wear in public). I also had the thought that the coworker is trying to pick on OP with the smelly hippie stereotype. Im sure she encounters scents she doesnt care for every day that she has no control over and she just deals with it. Diversion. It seems that the OP has taken a lot of measures to make sure that the coworker is comfortable. She pounced on that and tried to make it seem like using soap was somehow inconsiderate. This. (And if the scent is specifically patchouli, the coworker might not be bugging other coworkers because they dont carry patchouli scent. Like wearing perfume on days off that lingers even after bathing before coming back to work, or burning incense in ones own home, or storing clothes laundered in scent-free products in the same dresser or closet with clothes that havent been laundered that way, or having an air freshener in ones own car. All Rights Reserved. I definitely see making a reasonable effort to make sure you are not having a negative impact on the people in your work space. Yet every time shes near me she complains about the fragrances she says Im wearing. Clock out and walk around the block for 15 minutes before I come back to my desk? Never again. Has made my life hell for years. Most people are more than willing to do reasonable things for their coworkers comfort, but it sounds like the OPs coworker is the type thats totally unreasonable. The fastest, simplest and quietest way to communicate is through a chat tool, however, you've got to set some expectations around how it's used. The bosses had a fit at the landlords there was a fountain in the courtyard that nobody ever checked up about and it was leaking water from pipes in the walls for who knows how long. But that doesnt seem to be what the OP is dealing with just now, so she may need to change from the reasonable adult playbook to the dealing with a bully playbook. FWIW, our former college president was sensitive to smells. It can be very painful and isolating to have this kind of sensitivity. Mom is a total grown up hippie though. But I was situated in front of the AC, I could open windows and office doors to ventilate, we had an air purifier in the office, and he had a fan pointed on him pretty constantly blowing the scent away from him. I had to have an accommodation that I was warned early enough to take PTO for the day of and the day after, and that it HAD to be approved at no penalty to me, because I just could not be there. At this point, it seems to me that her behavior is/is verging on (whichever seems most appropriate to you) workplace bullying, and I am concerned. Then see what Boss says, and go from there. I cant stand it. LW here Nope, I dont use any kind of incense or oil diffusers at home. And its usually not like I can just switch from the scented version to the unscented one the one Im using is the only thing there is! This is why Im scared to take up perfume, for fear of being 80 and having a personal cloud of smell. I think they probably picked the maple-nut ice cream because it wasnt a flavor they were going to randomly run into between the initial exposure and the aversion test a few weeks later, but it was nice enough that kids would actually voluntarily choose it in the first place. Several of the suggestions above talk about completely changing what products one buys and what one does while at home. I cant hear what my sons saying if hes sitting next to me but facing the other direction, but cant not hear him eating popcorn from the other room. Calmly and professionally call out the patronizing person without making a scene or being dramatic by pointedly yet politely saying, "Gee, that comment sounded a bit condescending to me. DEAR DEIDRE: THE woman who sits behind me at work makes disgusting snorting noises all the time and it is driving me mad. If youve been sniffling for weeks or months, you can rule out a cold, Dr. Reisman says. Youre right that at this point shes probably already tried most or all of these things it really does sound like the OP is being extremely accommodating! If not I would actually quit over this. Im going to ask that we stop with those suggestions now and instead focus on how she should deal with the coworker, which I think will be more helpful to her. To me, anyway. Yes, my indie oils are my perfume. I think we can all agree that the best outcome would be for OP to shave her head, live in a sterilization chamber, and wear a new sterile smock every day. For me, my comments were about where the smell could still be coming from, since OP seems baffled that they could be smelling like anything after all theyve done to eliminate smells from their person. This. They will tackle the situation without compromising your request. Dude knew he shouldnt smoke and tried to quit repeatedly, and it is not like he didnt take steps to try to mitigate, but having a coworker complain repeatedly about him was mean. Take AAMs suggestions to speak to Manager or to take it to HR and see what kind of reaction you get. Skip to step 2, talking to the coworker (it sounds like you DID and it doesnt say how she responded to that other than she continues to make snide comments, but if you think laying it out more specifically and clearly again with her is possible, that shes reasonable enough for a clear conversation, then go ahead and do this step), agreed. They tried really hard, but they just couldnt control the variables enough for her to physically be there. Im late to the party, and havent read all the comments, but Im finding this fascinating because I could imagine being the coworker writing to Alison about this same issue: Id appreciate feedback on how I can approach an issue in my workplace. Or would you prefer that sound to sniffling? Never blows his nose, or uses a tissue Its very distracting, and personally I find it disgusting. its another to try to force someone to, say, buy a new wardrobe and try pills and special washes to absolutely rule out any and all possible causes. My hair styling product sort of smells like pineapple, and Ive noticed that once it dries you cant smell it but if I get rained on suddenly, pineapple. That just made my phantom smell issues like 10x worse because I was right one time.). For instance, I dont notice the smell of coal tar shampoo because I grew up in a household where both parents used it, but Ive heard people complain about the smell. Not only that, but it can also be a sign that your female coworker likes you but is hiding it. That said, I do have scented shampoo because there are like 3 on the market that are unscented, most of which I cant afford. I really feel for you. Thats really interesting. Possibly the only personal anecdote less interesting than a story about a dream you had, that doesn't involve the listener. Weve had plenty of discussions, especially regarding food, that scents are very personal and while someone may hate one they are completely fine with other strong scents. Agreed. 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